While vacationing in Florida two weeks ago, I decided to give Delightful Granddaughter a call.
Hi! What are you doing? I said cheerfully.
There was a short pause and then she said, Youre not going to like it Grandmaw.
What? WHAT? I squawked.
Tell me! What did you do? I demanded.
Im getting a tattoo, she said.
When paramedics revived me, I couldnt believe it my sweet granddaughter getting her lovely skin marred by a tattoo.
Why? Why? I asked.
She didnt give me answer, only saying, When I walked in, I told [the tattoo artist] that Grandmaw isnt going to like this.
Are you there now? Getting it done right now? Iasked.
Yes, she said.
Putthat tattoo person on the phone! I said.
I heard my granddaughter not-so-softly whisper, She called you the tattoo person.
What is it anyway? What is the tattoo? I said.
She said, Something I drew.
She would not elaborate.
Where is it? Where on your body? I asked,hoping it was someplace that couldnt be seenwhen covered with proper clothing.
My thigh, she said.
Suddenly, I couldnt breathe.
When paramedics revived me again, I figured there was nothing more I could do while in Florida.
Well, I still love you despite not agreeing with this decision, I said. But dont get any more tattoos!
When I hung up, I immediately confronted Dear Daughter, who I know sees nothing wrong with tattoos.
Faithful readers may recall she was my granddaughters age when she got a tattoo (against my wishes) while away at college and out of my reach so I couldnt wring her neck. When she finally fessed up, she described it as a little fairy.
Let me tell you, that fairy had the wing span of a robin! Ugh!
When I told Dear Daughter about herspawns tattoo, she seemed unfazed.
Youre a tattoo-phobic, a malady affecting old people, she said. Everybody is getting tattoos.
It doesnt mean I have to like it, I said.
Whats the world coming to?
Upon return from vacation, staff writer Shelley Terry got the scoop onDelightful Granddaughters tattoo its a bat, no doubt designed to drive Terrybatty!
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